11/2/2009 5:46 pm
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based on a true story
scene 1: a doctor's waiting room
several bored people sitting in waiting room, flipping through magazines... clock on wall reads 12:57... 7piecebucket bursts into room, out of breath... walks over to receptionist
7piece: I am here for my 1 o'clock appointment with Dr. Wood!
receptionist: Ah, yes. I see. And you would be... [flips through papers and squints] ... Mr. 7inchbucket? It says here that you are to have a "procedure" at 1 pm, followed by the actual doctor's appointment at 2. Please have a seat.
7piece: Thank you. [takes seat and starts reading magazine... after a while, 7piece crosses one leg, then squirms a bit... then he crosses the other leg and squirms some more... finally...]
7piece: Stupid 46 ounce Sprite! [as he gets up and goes to bathroom]
a few seconds later, a man dressed in scrubs ("Tom") comes out of a door beside the receptionist
Tom: [calling out] 7piecebucket! [pause] 7piecebucket! It is time for your "procedure". 7piecebucket!
receptionist: I could have sworn I saw him a minute ago.
Tom: 7piecebucket!
7piecebucket walks out of restroom, unsuspecting
receptionist: Oh, there he is! I knew I saw him around here.
everyone in waiting room looks up from magazine and turns to look at 7piece coming out of bathroom
Tom: 7piecebucket? It is time for your "procedure".
7piece: Uunnngghhhhhhh... [adjusting pants]
Tom: It never fails, does it? Come on back this way.
7piece follows Tom through door into hallway
Tom: My name is Tom, and I will be doing the ultrasound on you today. Have you ever had one of these done on you before? [extends hand to shake 7piece's hand]
7piece: Uhhhh, no, I haven't. [shakes Tom's hand]
Tom: Say, that is a really good grip you have got there! What do you do for a living?
7piece: I work with computers.
Tom: Really? That is unusual. Your grip is really strong. It is like a mechanic's grip!
7piece: I have practice. 
Tom: Well, then! Step inside this room, and we will get you started.
break to commercial
"lol die by the pen HAHA"
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5462 posts 11/2/2009 6:24 pm |
Dr. Wood? Well, it could have been Dr. Hugh G. Rection......
The Slug
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1426 posts 11/2/2009 6:39 pm |
Uhm...how come you needed an ultrasound of your janx? Everything okay with the Bucket?
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2537 posts 11/2/2009 7:26 pm |
OMG> OMG>OMG.
Let's go eat stuff.
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8755 posts 11/2/2009 9:28 pm |
ooo -- cool story time! ok: jammies... comfy robe... favorite blankie and pillow... sleeping bag.
i'm ready for more!
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15527 posts 11/2/2009 11:13 pm |
hahaha!!!! Hope all ended well. Don't you love that doctor-patient paradigm? When they disempower you, short of dis - everything you?
I like Slug's version of doc's name, too!
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611 posts 11/3/2009 3:52 am |
Whatever comes of this appointment, will you be seeking a second opinion? You may want to call on some of the various fraternal organizations for physicians (just to make sure your doctor is a member in good standing). You hang in there. I'll be pulling for you. Love ya, Buck.
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612 posts 11/3/2009 11:22 am |
As Bonnie Raitt says, "You really, really crack me up."
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5036 posts 11/3/2009 11:43 am |
Okay, I'm trying to figure out if I should read this or not.
Should I read it?
Am I purty worried?
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15129 posts 11/3/2009 1:32 pm |
The pre-biopsy procedure is a heartbreaker.
The Really Good Looking nurse
lubes you THOROUGHLY...then leaves.
To be followed by the little leering
Greek Doctor with the needle.
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12214 posts 11/3/2009 8:06 pm |
I'm thinking like Eatmoonpie. They don't do ultrasounds unless your doctor suspects something.
Hope all is right.
We're still in medieval time of healthcare. 
Cheers !
-E
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13777 posts 11/3/2009 10:27 pm |
OMG
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2561 posts 11/4/2009 4:02 pm |
Hey, ev'rone. Sorry I am slow getting the rest of this up, but I was busy helping to take care of dae's Mom for much of yesterday. A doctor's visit and two units of blood later, dae's Mom is doing much better, at least for the time being. She ate a ham sandwich for lunch and then went out with a friend to go knitting. Maybe there is something to be said for vampirism.
Now, on to your replies...
slug: Funny you should mention that. I do have a real life friend named Dr. S. M. Payne.
eatmoonpie: Is everything okay with the Bucket???? What are you, Little Miss Spoiler? Tune in next week and find out! Don't want you to jinx my janx or anything.
violet: Was it the bathroom scene that got to you? OMG OMG OMG! Don't open that door!!!!!!!
LBD: That's the spirit! Gather round and listen, while I hold a fleshlight beneath my face.
GypsyToons: Well, I don't think they disempeckered me, if that's what you're getting at. At least, not yet.
POP: I think I can probably pull my own, thank you very much, but the thought is definitely appreciated. Gotta look after our brothers!
jethrotulliver: Thanks! Hey, how did you know that's what Bonnie Raitt said to me?
EW: I guess you could always look at all the pretty pictures.
KC: Yes, Tom actually makes reference to that in one of the later episodes.
Eski: Not quite. In the medieval time of healthcare, they would probably would have put my janx in an iron maiden.
IQ: You picked up right where violet left off. Don't open that door!!!!!!!
"lol die by the pen HAHA"
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